Embrace your emotions
2013/05/09 Leave a comment
About pain and suffering
2013/02/08 1 Comment
Richard:
Suffering has become an essential part of common sense. But it isn’t given.
Suffering derives from dualism …. which isn’t given, too.
Me:
For sure, suffering IS what the human condition is about – generally speaking.
But while someone is in pain, you can hardly say this to this person: your suffering derives from dualism…
It won´t be heard. Besides, it will be interpreted like an awful cynicism.
I guess if we want to help someone else, we have to have learned ourselves what
non-duality is about.
Richard:
Very well said. I’ve often been thinking what the essential difference is between suffering and pain. It seems there’s no significant border between these two expressions. Maybe real pain is like the physical answer for any violence on your body. And suffering are the thoughts about pain.
What do you think?
Me:
We can easily get lost in different notions, can´t we?…
You see, we have been so socialized by the culture to be “down”, to worry, to ascribe suffering and pain a far too large a significance. No matter if the pain is the outcome of thought or something else, it is there as a constant reminder. We have to learn to observe this process dispassionately.
WHY IS IT CONSTANTLY THERE…?
Everybody suffers, it is human…everybody takes that as a given truth.
But is it ok to be in pain? Why do we take pain and suffering as “the real thing”?
Why have we built up our personality on this delusion of hardship, pain, resistance…?
Why can´t we live in Joy instead…?
This is not a rhetorical question, but something to be “seriously” considered.
Why don´t we usually feel Joy and Ease Now…? Why…?
Is it because I don´t allow myself?
Is it civilized to choose pain and conflict before joy and peace…?
Is it civilized to have a life full of suffering?
These questions are to be observed as they arise in the moment.
Cause only in the moment the switch from Suffering and Pain to Joy and Equanimity
can be made…
A very interesting discussion about approaching Ego
2012/11/09 1 Comment
That was the original post:
You´ve surely heard this:
“Oh, life sucks.” Such an incredibly arrogant and pretentious thing to say.
No my friend, life never sucks. You suck. Your pathetic mind sucks.
SpinklinThoughts: Compassion…
Seeingwhat is: With the ego?
Boosting the ego?
That is not doing anyone a favour. The suffering for the ego is constant anyway. If someone oppose, there is an ego opposing.
Me: There is a sort of twisted arrogance in suffering and making other suffer. I nurture no sympathy for that.
I only have compassion for humble simplicity…
SpinklinThoughts: And with that statement, sir, do you not revel in your own ego? Do you not disclose your own ‘duality’ and thus your distance from where you claim to ‘be’?
Me: You are seemingly right. You see though, I do not claim to be, I AM.
Being “truthful” sometimes means to create a healthy distance from what is, in what is not.
Duality has to be approached with duality, otherwise there is no chance for being heard. There are moments when being meek and humble is a sham.
Seeingwhatis responding SpinklinThoughts: It sounds like a paradox, I know, but oftentimes, the only way to do “good” is to not want or try to do good.
Defending nice and polite behaviour is not really nice. It may be at times, but not as a rule. The only law, that is at work, not rule but universal law is, that seeing what is, have “positive” results. And refusing to see negativity in the seemingly good, always results in bad things, out of which suffering touch our hearts the most and becomes a focus.
The only way to stop suffering is to admit paradoxes…For example, compassion with ego will have terrible consequenses…
Helping people is to help them defeat the ego. The ego does not want this and play on presumed empathy, like you do now.
I don’t mean that your ego is speaking. Maybe you know more than I do about things. Maybe. I just know or rather see what I see.
You have the right to be unhappy
2012/11/03 Leave a comment
Most humans want to punish others for their being unhappy.
Unhappiness is virtue. We live in democracy – if I suffer, I have to make you suffer.
What the hell…Suffering is our pride.
If we are miserable you must be miserable too.
What is money really?
2012/11/01 1 Comment
Yes, this seems to be an impossible topic. Even more impossible task to render in few words.
But as I always want to keep it simple, here is the deal:
Money is the direct and indirect outcome of man´s idea of effort, punishment, suffering,
fear, projection and compensation.
Does Man know anything about worth or his self-worth? Hard question…
Worth derives from man´s idea of effort, and as man secretly thinks he deserves to be punished, it means that Worth is a relief, some kind of time out from suffering. Man´s image of Worth is thus a derivative of punishment.
Effort equates punishment, that is fear to be. Effort is the distance from What is, to What it can be, that is, a mere projection. Man fears his projection, it is serious stuff as Projection is becoming. Deprive man of his projection of becoming and he is lost.
Thus money is just an attempt to equate worth, a substitution for effort and resistance, a compensation for suffering and fear to be, indeed, man´s abstract means to reach his delusory projection.
It´s hard to speculate what would happen if humans saw through and dropped this immemorial illusions of time, suffering, effort, punishment and fear…
For now, it is Utopic, but just imagine if we all were happy – would there be anyone to punish…?
If there was no one to punish, would there be any projection of your self-worth…?
Give it a thought:
If we all were all happy and free to find our real existential motivation, if no fear was to compensate,
would there be any need for money then?…
If everybody was happy, who would be there to put a price in a unfathomably rich Universe…?
Are you happy to remain unhappy?
2012/10/18 2 Comments
I experience an ever-growing and impending feeling that EVERY SECOND IS IMPORTANT! Unspeakably valuable. This second has nothing to do with time. Time doesn´t create value – VALUE IS THE REAL TIME – and Value is this second, the real timeless time.
WHAT ARE WE GIVING THIS SECOND TO?… What is really building us up, and what is not…? Can we seriously and attentively approach this question?
What counts and what doesn´t?…… What has a real value?
Is there any value in suffering? Or Real Value can be perceived only when you´ve done away with suffering?
I see every day people stubbornly clinging and holding on to their destructive patterns. Many of them claim they want to “change”, but the truth of the matter is that they love to be in the obscure zones, they like it there. Issues are their motivation. Darkness feels home, it´s there many thrive.
If you tell them that change is possible, they seem to listen but in fact, they don´t.
They inertially continue to create suffering for themselves and others. So strange it is – they would never admit it, but it appears that secretly, people want to suffer. They love their tormentors. They love by turns to be either executioners or victims. Indeed, identification with suffering has been going on for millennia. How can we understand that since Pericles´ time, almost 2500 years ago, humanity has had more or less only madmen as leaders? What does it prove?…
Suffering. Since immemorial time man thinks he deserves to suffer.
Can we question this entrenched highly perverted conditioning? Do we really want to assume this ubiquitous issue seriously? Can you see that there is no value in delusional identification with suffering??
For sure, Suffering is time. It can only exist in time. When you give up your identification with suffering, time is automatically dissolved. In that timeless state you will get to know The Ineffable Second I am talking about.
A new step, a new intent – a second, it´s all it takes. So I ask you:
Do you want to take this step towards renewal?
Or, ARE YOU HAPPY TO REMAIN UNHAPPY?…
A dialogue about something we never talk about
2012/07/13 Leave a comment
Jane:
I am learning to walk in the middle of this messy chaotic world. We are all swimming in the stream of universal suffering. Learning to find joy in this tear ridden stream is liberating. Facing my grief about all the sadness I see in the world is requiring me take a look around. It is not only “I” who know this pain, because grief is our universal experience.
Coming face to face with my own humanity has been quite painful. I do not want to die, just like all other beings on this earth. This sorrow “I” feel about all my losses is like a stream that runs in the underpinnings of all our lives. I am shining Light into the darkness, discovering my truths in the experience of my own suffering. There is no time to waste. This morning I am here, this afternoon I could be gone from the earth. I am working with the bones of loss – my mortality.
My answer:
When we say “death” what is it we really fear…?
Everything we do, happens in the shadow of Death. We have to learn to promptly and thoroughly delve and discover what loss, – respectively -, what Death is about. There is no other way to do that but through own experience, through direct confrontation.
Unless we face this huge counterpart of life which is death, we will be afraid to live, we will know nothing about Life. Nothing essential. We will never know either what Love, Joy, Creativity, Empathy are about.
What are we holding to really?… Cause we know nothing about the nature of death, thus we fear not death,
WE ARE AFRAID OF OUR THOUGHT OF IT.
Why are we afraid of reality?…CAN WE INQUIRE THAT?…openly, without any prejudice or impatience, without any urge to draw a hasty conclusion…?
Can we look our fear(s) in the eye without finding half-hearted answers…?
Can we concomitantly find out what our thoughts and thinking is about? Because – isn´t it so, – if thinking didn´t exist, fear as we know it, wouldn´t exist either. Fear is consequently the gap between “what is” and “what it could be”.
If we understood wholly and thoroughly “what is”, would “what could be” have any effect on us any longer?
Let´s face it… – Death is constant renewal, the losing of the known.
What do we fear at the end of the day?…
Isn´t it so that we are afraid to lose “the known” – our experience, suffering, memory, identity – that we in fact are afraid of “the unknown”, which is undivided Life, our real abode…?
Can we delve now into this “unknown” and with an unbiased mind find out?
An older post
2012/07/03 Leave a comment
I will repost this as I find that questions here are worthwhile considering:
“Why do I keep writing here? God knows…
Does it make any difference? Maybe it does…may be it doesn´t. Who knows really…?
All these told or untold stories of mine – do they create some kind of echo? Do they inspire you? Do they mean something for you?
There are moments, when even uttering or writing a single word is excruciating pain.
THE INEXPRESSIBLE PAIN OF BEING DISCURSIVE, at the same time nurturing the wish to create some kind of intelligible sense…Where is to find a common denominator in these seemingly irreconcilable aspects?
Life doesn´t make sense. It doesn´t obey our logic. But in the midst of all this pervasive circus, there is a kind of secret “coherent” relation between things, between people, yes, between you and me.
Thinking in logical terms, what is the chance of you and me communicating? Almost none…And yet, despite our so different life-stories, there is something within us, some kind of secret, ineffable bond that is beyond logic, beyond – what we may call it – daily comprehension.
Life is a series of interruptions, that´s no question about that. Despite this baffling truth, we struggle to create order, purpose, continuity.
BUT OUR STRIVE FOR ORDER AND CONTINUITY REINFORCES OUR HYPOCRISY, as it based on fear.
It is a hard task for me to put in words what THE SOUL WHISPERS but my reason doesn´t fully understand.
There is no such thing as “after”. After or before what?…Is there a point of reference really? And if there is, WHAT IS IT? Where is it to be found objectively…?
The surmise of a fix point of reference is the beginning of Suffering with all its derivatives: judgement, comparison, conditioning, neuroses.
This “point of reference” is called Ego. The ego perpetuates itself through memory, through “time”, through effort, desire and frustration.
The paradox is that this very moment is neutral. This moment doesn´t have a memory, as every moment is a new breath. The Ego refuses vehemently to know this.
Now, no relation between different aspects can exist unless there is a point of reference. Ego is exactly this: an imaginary sum of different sequences of false relations. I repeat – ego is “false relation” as there is no such thing as a fix point in real life.
If the starting point is “nonexistent”, whatever you do is false. The attributes of the ego are Desire and Illusion. These are based on Fear, nay, they are fear. Fear is the vehicle through which Ego maintains itself, clinging to a non-existent reality which tries to be real.
Now, I am aware that for those of you who never approached things from this angle, what I say here may sound like Chinese.
But those ones who have come so far, are probably ready to have read this.
To summarize: all of you know that everybody is trying hardly to be someone, to dominate the other, to arrive, to find security, to struggle desperately for identity. Everybody is in war for his limits and possessions.
Our logic is built on these millennial delusions. Inside the illusion of struggling for Being, there is no place for Love, Joy, Beauty, Meaning, Friendship or Wisdom. In this way of living there is only place for reckless competition, suffering, war and destruction.
Almost all our creations bear the legacy of this huge existential misunderstanding.
It is probably ripe time for you and me to abandon this outdated paradigm, this” daily comprehension”, to understand the structure of our limited Logic and raison d’être, confronting these timeless illusions in order to take a new step toward that secret ineffable place beyond Fear, where Love dwells.
It is about time…
Related articles
- Who are we really? (julienmatei.com)
- “No” doesn´t exist (julienmatei.com)
What is ego?A new paradigm
2012/04/27 7 Comments
