Letter to Melanie

Even someone being 15-year-old is already “too old” in this infantile world of ours. It´s a fact, most of the people stop growing mentally and stagnate intellectually when they are about 12-13. Growing up and maturing is somehow against the laws and expectations of society …so most of them already die when 17, but buried when they are 80…it´s tragic or incredibly comic.

So, yes, unfortunately those “special” encounters with those persons – “you can see in their eyes that they have an idea about life and also that they kind of know who you are and that they understand you somehow” – are  rather seldom.

As you know, most people want it “the easy way” – whatever transcends this easy – way attitude, scares them. Alas, how many times haven´t I heard “oh, why are you so difficult and hard to please?”
I´ll tell you what : I saw a picture of myself in Romania when I was  2, and already then I was “too old” =)) God in heaven , I had the glance of a visionary, very grave, as if  I already knew everything.

You say : “at the moment I´m really searching for myself, inventing myself again and I´m on a good way”
But think it over – do you think Self can be searched for?
Who is looking for what here?…

You are already the person you are looking for – but you don´t seem to know that yet 🙂
When we search for and try reinventing ourselves is not Self we are looking for, but the illusion of a Self, the ego 🙂

Searching presupposes the idea of acquisition – the effort to acquire, generates struggle and isolation, but you see…
You are not a sum of qualities, something to hope for, as they wrongly tought you 🙂


About julienmatei
I feel an inner urge to express what I see, to communicate and share with others all these impressions. Often the things I see are there, not yet manifest, but waiting... to be observed, talked about, and embraced. These new insights need another approach, a more vivid curiosity... Due to fear and prejudice we prefer to see only "the official" truth - but THE OFFICIAL TRUTH IS DEAD - being dead, it has nothing to give... We can continue pretending Death is fascinating or... we can take the trouble to LIVE... THE NEW has no definition yet... Again, IT requires another "perception", the courage to apprehend everything differently, from a totally new angle, with new confidence and inquisitive touch. This blog is not about interesting concepts, it is about participation... finding new solutions, inspiration, togetherness.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: