Nobody will tell you this – read and forget

Don´t believe in anything other than the joy you feel!

Joy doesn´t adhere to any system, dogma, or “prefabricated” thought!

Joy is this imponderable now, this uncreated moment…

Everything created no matter if it´s 4000 thousands years old or 1 hour old, frustrates your freedom.

FREEDOM HAS NO OBJECT, it cannot be caught in whatever pattern, it is indescribable.

Joy, like freedom, is the bliss of un-knowing…unknowing is real Knowledge.

Forget everything you´ve just read here 🙂

Free us from our daily conditioning

It is a conspicuous fact that everybody acts according to his conditioning.

Philosophers and scientists think and behave in a certain way, musicians and poets in their way, politicians, spiritually aware, doctors, economists, hairdressers, house wifes, business people, thieves, activists, the rich and the poor, the gifted or the ignorant – so on and so forth – see the world in their specific way, each and everyone tacitly claiming his truth is the most valid.

The blind man claims his truth, the deaf, the catholic, the zen monk likewise.

But whose truth is more “valid”? The infatuated or the callous´, the whore´s or the saint´s, the truth of the “spiritually aware”, the truth of the atheist, or maybe the executioner knows best the course of things, or is it the victim…?


Everybody is dying in his own language…

Whose truth are we expected to buy? Whose conditioning are we to swallow and digest today? In whose language do we want to die?…

This hollow and strenuous competition of opinion, everybody contradicting each other, everybody imposing and struggling to be right…

Really the world feels like a terrible nuisance sometimes. It´s a curse knowing that whatever “truth” you might say will be perceived according to the other´s conditioning and projection.

It is so infinitely tiresome and frustrating…


Is it better to keep silent? I really wonder…

Can we ever break the mirrors of projection? Can we understand and be free from conditioning?

Can we ever…?

Another letter to Jane

You can read this post as it is, but if you want a clearer picture of this, you might want to read this first:

“Yesterday afternoon, I went to meet a friend.

We spoke about wishes, desire in general.

That is rather curious – like you, he expressed the same metaphor about the bar of soap. You can´t hold to it too strong, as it slips out of the hand; but if you stretch your palm and let the hand being relaxed, there is a chance one can seize the moment…

It is rather awkward to find words for what I try to say. The nearest I can come with, is that “now” is intertwined with different “nows” from “the future”, that somehow, different “nows” can be condensed into a simultaneous “now-experience” embracing both time and timelessness.

It is something like a film director watching every single shot, but having at the same time the whole clear picture going through every detail.

I  will use again another music analogy – if a play a suite by Bach, every tone has to bear the whole piece, as if the whole piece was condensed in a single second. A tone is Now, but the whole piece becomes some kind of “enhanced now”. It feels that a 15 minutes long composition is contained in a single “now-breath”.

This is a very pragmatic and very fascinating inner process, if I sound like speculating is because I am short of words…

It happens to me quite often that I want something and before I think it, it happens. I could give innumerable examples of this. It´s like I got what I wanted, but I “was not responsible” for my actions, as I didn´t understand what I did.

I don´t know exactly what buttons I push in those moments, but there is some kind of “magic” mechanism, having to do with this “enhanced perception” of now…

It is a similar state like dreaming – when I am in that “magic now” I have the tools to direct and embody energies to get a PRECISE outcome, exactly like a writer or film director does.

It sounds like a terrible hubris, but in the same manner a film director plans his movie, one could deliberately create astounding things in real life.

What I kind of “know”, is that this “enhanced Now” is a powerful tool for deliberate creation.

We can create at will. I am aware that this may sound so unfounded and irrational, and although it seems like a simple delusion, it is a very powerful and fruitful process to unfold.

I would be very grateful for some feed back on this.”

A thought for today

Every real wish should be honoured… not through ambition, but through the delight of pure action 🙂

Ordinary Life... Less Ordinary

Not normally one for Vampires but the following was written in response to tonight’s Poetics at dVerse Poets Pub

Finger tip by finger tip
you tease me
through every note
of a lingering legato
In rise and fall, you
like distant thunder
in an opiate sky
Sharp intake
Breath held in the black
and I descend in cinnabar
like the waterfall
you want me to become
I’m undone
spilt milk
Your hunger satiated
For tonight

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A question to Jane

It sounds maybe like a common “truth”, but sometimes it feels that the destination for everything is this very moment – Now…whatever “now” means.

The thing is that I have a feeling there are different variations of Now. “Nows” that last for a single moment, but also nows that can last for years, decades or even more.

 I don´t intend to indulge in a philosophical debate, my question is this:

Can Now be the moment but also a bond to another now? In plain language, is there a linear destination, something like an “enhanced now”?…

We could say that MUSIC consists of different sequences of now, every tone being comprised in a shorter or longer now…

To illustrate my point, you know that there were Zen masters who in front of an audience played one single tone, bowed and left :) happy

I can hardly do that in concerts, even if I am tempted to do so…:P tongue

At the end of the day,  A SINGLE TONE IS SUFFICIENT…

With this attitude, all music or whatever artistic endeavour become totally insignificant – I´ve always been puzzled by this.

So with Life…

You somehow sense that everything happens now, simultaneously. If we really assumed this, there wouldn´t exist any destination, no effort would be needed whatsoever, as that would mean that everything is Suchness, immutability… What do I know, if more individuals knew this, Time as such, would either shrink or cease to exist.

I am aware that what I say may seem far-fetched and unreal, but on one level there might be some grain of “reality”.

What do you think?

Life is an open book

The funny thing is that there are only answers to get.

But in order to realize them you have to formulate the right questions.

What is losing and what is winning?

If you want to know what “Winning” is about, you have to learn the difficult art of Accepting Defeat and Losing deliberately.

A quote for today by Krishnamurti

Illusion exists as long as there is the desire, pleasure, fear and sorrow.

The mirrorless Self

In my last post I wrote this :

“It is a hard task for me to put in words what THE SOUL WHISPERS  but my reason doesn´t fully understand.”

It means that there is some kind of inner authority within myself, whose voice I sometimes hear, and from which I learn.

As it were, I don´t hear it when I am restless, agitated or too keen to hear it.

What is this “too keen to hear, to have or be something?” As I can clearly see it, it means that if I want something badly, I will only get the reverse of my wish. The stronger the wish, the greater the distance between me and the “wished-for” reality, or experience.

 If I was to be asked what is the most important thing in life, I would answer undoubtedly: meaningful relations.

Yes, one of my greatest priorities in life is people, encounters, dialogue. To be in the company of open, intelligent, spiritually generous, unbiased persons, is a blessing.

I have to confess, that this is exactly the thing Life has refused me along the years. Such a painful paradox: the more I looked for contact and vivid connection with others, the more distance I created and the more lonely I became.

God, how I suffered because of this…Especially knowing that I have a lot to give, being always genuinely interested to understand “the other”, trying to create nearness and confidence.
I would instead attract all kind of callous, vain, vindictive cowards, who misused my interest and attention, taking without giving something back.

You could meet these persons once, to realize that next time you saw them, they would pretend they don´t know you.

So what was the lesson the Universe was so harshly teaching me?

Reaching the point of utter despair, I became aware of this hardly digestible truth:


This raises a very essential and vital question:


I wouldn´t dream of wasting time with unfruitful ruminating. It is clear that contact with Self, is contact with everything! It appears that only Self is Reality, both mirror and mirror-less.

I was forced to understand this hard lesson of turning to mySelf, to the most important authority within: the connection with this timeless inner Voice.

I still fall into the trap of looking outside for company, being the victim of my own sorrow that not more people are interested to communicate.

Yesterday I went to my usual cafe, feeling again that well-known state of despondency. I opened my blog, reading and learning from my last post and SUDDENLY, I was seized with peace and ease. I was again feeling alive and satisfied,
It was weird and confusing to observe how people around got curious and noticed my presence out of the blue, while I was totally uninterested of what was going on around me.

To conclude.

The only real authority to be trusted is contact with the Inner Voice. Contact with Self heals us from sadness, craving and false dependence. Hence, Desire is the best sign we are out of touch with this nameless Center within.

Desire – that is, too big the passion – without connection with Self  is unspeakable pain, wretchedness.

Our desires have a chance to come true only when we are in touch with the Center of our being. Contact with Self is the soothing caress of Happiness, and the connection with it heals and opens the right doors.

Happiness without craving is the only authority to be trusted.