There is no one else to validate you other than you

She wrote:
“My fate is to lose in love every time. I am so confused that why it happens to me, so I asked my doctor about it. She said that there is no answer really, I just have to concentrate on my goals – to be a published author and keep on inspiring people. I sometimes feel that in inspiring others, I have lost a part of my self, especially my heart! People say, and I know that I am attractive, but my life has been in the hands of God – there is a strong sense of Destiny involved.

When I think of the future, I feel scared, I do not want a long life, I don’t want to live to a ripe old age! I feel like I am 100 years old already! The future seems hopeless, too vast, my strength is waning…”

My answer:

What is the significance of any goal whatsoever…?

Why do we generally need “goals”?

Simply put, to escape our deep dissatisfaction now.
“Goal” is the perfect means to escape this very moment.

If we were at ease, deeply contented, deeply present, we wouldn´t need “goals”,
as what is considered a goal would pretty much come by itself naturally
and gracefully.

You may be pretty much aware of this, if you are honest with yourself.

Let me put it straight, as there can be no misunderstanding as to the “rightness”
of my words:

We “lose” in love every time – failing to have fulfilling relations – because in
a sort of
weird way, we fail to love ourselves.

After all, you say it yourself: “I sometimes feel that in inspiring others,
I have lost a part of my self – especially my heart!”

It´s obviously ripe time for you to admit this truth: you are the one needing
your own attention, your own love. You need to find the deep-seated
inspiration in yourself, not outwardly.

When we use words like “God” or “Destiny”, they are in fact not real, as we but
tend to project are fears, shortcomings and illusions in these words.
Life has no “preferences”. Ultimately what we call God is
Universal Presence – Love with other words. If Love is free, how can it then
have any expectation on you?…

Back to the root question, the most difficult one:

How can you validate yourself? How can we love ourselves when no one has ever taught us how to really do it…?

Really, do we want to play hide and seek or do you want to love and be loved…?

The question here is: how can we awake our heart from being numb…?

Cause if our hearts are numb, we will meet other numb hearts.We have the answer in our sorrow: we have to heal through lovingly accepting our pain, acknowledging our present predicament. As long as we flee our pain, the bigger it becomes.

Usually, you are afraid of the future because your past is unresolved. And being
unresolved, it kills your Now, making you fear the future – the future not being more
than the projection of the past.

Bottom line:

Accept your pain and hardships cause there´s the answer to your life.

About julienmatei
I feel an inner urge to express what I see, to communicate and share with others all these impressions. Often the things I see are there, not yet manifest, but waiting... to be observed, talked about, and embraced. These new insights need another approach, a more vivid curiosity... Due to fear and prejudice we prefer to see only "the official" truth - but THE OFFICIAL TRUTH IS DEAD - being dead, it has nothing to give... We can continue pretending Death is fascinating or... we can take the trouble to LIVE... THE NEW has no definition yet... Again, IT requires another "perception", the courage to apprehend everything differently, from a totally new angle, with new confidence and inquisitive touch. This blog is not about interesting concepts, it is about participation... finding new solutions, inspiration, togetherness.

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