Love can never be real without genuine connection – a dialogue about intimate relations

I have been seeing a man who expects me to hang off his every word as though it’s never yet been thought, and yet, when I try to contribute to the conversation, he reads a newspaper, or looks around, and once I’ve said something, he proceeds to say “Sorry, what did you say?” Sometimes, he is so obviously engrossed in something else that even when I’m silent, he says “Sorry, what was that?” almost as an afterthought, or a pretense that he was trying to listen when he’s really just waiting for me to be quiet so he can speak again.

I don’t expect all my thoughts and comments to be mind-blowing, though they are certainly often outside of the realm of “normal”…but I do expect to be shown the respect of being heard, especially since he so desires that from me. Or. Perhaps I just need a new man-friend.

Because love – can never be real love – without genuine connection, and genuine connection cannot occur in a communication vacuum

Tell me, is he rich at least? 😛

No, but really…relations are a conundrum.

Sorry for being so overly frank, but how on earth can you put up with such a self-infatuated and conceited fellow?

The feminine psyche is a total paradox so I wonder:

Does his disrespectful attitude somehow secretly make you look up to him?

Is it something in this type of behaviour which inertially triggers you?

What made you fall for him after all?…

There are women who are turned off if shown too much interest and affectionate attention.
They tacitly ask to be dominated and demeaned and thus are unconsciously drawn to this type of male who keeps them in constant turmoil.

There are very few genuine and intimate relations in this world. Most of them are built on distance. Mutual exploitation. Whims. Manipulation. What draws people together is usually the false self.

It´s about time maybe you revise the motive behind your attraction to this guy, assuming your own words:

“Love can never be real without genuine connection, and genuine connection cannot occur in a communication vacuum.”

Indeed, it is ripe time we become aware and face our inner vacuum, and start the real communication with the True Self. Only then we may know what Love is about.

About julienmatei
I feel an inner urge to express what I see, to communicate and share with others all these impressions. Often the things I see are there, not yet manifest, but waiting... to be observed, talked about, and embraced. These new insights need another approach, a more vivid curiosity... Due to fear and prejudice we prefer to see only "the official" truth - but THE OFFICIAL TRUTH IS DEAD - being dead, it has nothing to give... We can continue pretending Death is fascinating or... we can take the trouble to LIVE... THE NEW has no definition yet... Again, IT requires another "perception", the courage to apprehend everything differently, from a totally new angle, with new confidence and inquisitive touch. This blog is not about interesting concepts, it is about participation... finding new solutions, inspiration, togetherness.

3 Responses to Love can never be real without genuine connection – a dialogue about intimate relations

  1. Pingback: Deliberate Defiance | Snippets & Glimpses

  2. Nataly says:

    Ha! 🙂 No, he’s not rich. (But I have never been concerned with money as a measure of worth.)

    And although I know you were joking, your comment raises some interesting questions which run through the undercurrent of society…should women put up with men who are self-serving, or arrogant, or just plain “twats” because they are rich? And, alternately, should men put up with women who are “crazy bitches” just because they are hot?

    It’s interesting that these beliefs potentially underscore many attitudes towards relationships across cultures and countries.

    • julienmatei says:

      These could my words as well:

      “Snippets and glimpses are all you give me, never the full picture, just pieces of you, mismatched, jagged and broken, and so you get from me no more.”

      Now…if we are so hellishly fragmented, how could we ever see and therefore reach each other naturally…? Where there is wholeness there is Love.. How could we ever love if we never exeprience what inner wholeness is about?…

      Shards seeing shards.

      How can a snippet ever know the whole picture?

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