You are not your life story

Mirrors of Encounters

“Briefly, for me, non-attachment to feelings and/or ideas is the ability to watch, feel and experience without believing the narrative that might accompany the feelings or the experience and then being able to respond if appropriate rather than reacting.

It’s about living in the moment and surrendering to the unknown.”

Monica Cassani

How true her words ring here, as if she was talking to me: I realize awestricken that
my feelings are telling me a very treacherous story about myself.

This is such a trap:

Will I continue listening and identifying with this false tale about who I am?

Whose drama am I living which calls itself “me”?

Most of us are the convicts of our life stories. With an iron grip, these ageless narratives keep us hopelessly stuck in dreams which are not our own.

I take it again: unbeknownst, we live out ancestral nightmares, which constantly
deprive us of directly…

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Do not follow the zeitgiest

What is primarily needed is not compliance without reflection, but a critical eye seeking the truth, a clear voice that dares to speak out, especially when it comes to uncomfortable issues. More important than indulging in further intellectual pursuit is to train our defiance.

If we stop being defiant, then we will end up in obedient recklessness which will totally destroy and disfigure us.

– Owe Wikström

Be imperfect, be alive

Everything real is a dance between chaos and order, between consonance and dissonance. Dissonance creates consonance, and consonance needs its counterpart. Life is a glorious blend of beauty and ugliness. Only the dead are perfect, the alive is eternally imperfect! So I tell you, be imperfect, be alive!

This is what a worthwhile Life is about

Pure perception.

A sense of unobtrusive Order.

Clarity. Structure. Harmony.

Unforced discipline.

Inner Peace.

She told me to be fair

I was.

She didn´t like it.

Is he genuine, or, is he not…?

I kind of like Mooji, his Master may have helped him see parts of The Truth, but his inability to help others is quite conspicuous.

He says:
“Very often people say to me, ‘Mooji, I am so unhappy but you don’t seem to care or even want to know what is going on.’
And actually, it is true. I don’t want to know what you think is going on. And, I don’t believe you.
Nothing is going on.
You are happy by nature but think you are unhappy.
Your unhappiness is totally made up.
You are just too lazy to look inside yourself.”

Of course, unhappiness is delusional ultimately speaking, but to say to the utterly unhappy, or depressed, that his unhappiness is made up, that he is happy by nature, is indeed a sign of disrespect and cynicism. Too maliciously simplistic.

It is a rather suspect lack of compassion here, and for the record, of know-how.

What can a man do if the only thing he has ever known is illusion?

I say to you mr Mooji that it is you who in all likelihood are too lazy to look further into your real nature.

Don´t be exceedingly alive with the dead – unless you want to take on their vengeance

Sometimes you are lonelier than lonely

You go through life threatening trials, indeed, veritable ordeals, and after inhuman strain, you skillfully manage to come out alive…You then try to reach out and share what you have been through.

Despite the manifest perils and the harshness of your experience what do you hear?

“Oh, it was all in your mind, it couldnt´t have been that bad, don’t overdo it…”

And then you wanna say: “It was much worse than your idiotic idea of what “bad” entails, you petty moron. Stop discarding the seriousness of Life, relegating it to some kind of inane kindergarten affair!”

An entire life for a single tone

I don´t usually speak directly about myself. But this time I feel this prompting wish to share this with you all.

For the record, I am a composer and a concert pianist.


I have been practising these three partitas by Bach (in B major, C minor and A minor) for the last 27 years. I even played them in concerts. The thing is that… yes, the tones were there all along, the expression came out right, but something was always missing. My rendition of these suites didn´t feel convincing. Not accurate enough. Really maddening…Alas…Despite hours and hours of toil and hard work, something indefinable, something beyond my conscious reach didn´t allow me to feel settled…at ease…with this music.

Today in the morning as I was pondering this hopeless predicament, being utterly discouraged, I had a sort of epiphany: Before sitting at the piano, out of the blue I HEARD A SINGLE TONE…both inside and outside of me coming from nowhere…Not only that it entirely “held me”, but this very “inaudible tone” felt like the fundamental essence which is behind and contains all written and yet unwritten Music. The inner invisible structure of all music: GRACE.

It all happened in an instant. It felt as if a veil was taken from my soul. I was speechless. I couldn´t believe my senses: After all these years of working my fingers to the bone, Bach´s music was there in all its shining beauty. Simple in all its unfathomable complexity.

All those seemingly technically unsurpassable passages I had struggled with throughout the years were now seamlessly easy…

It all made Sense now. 

And it made sense, because I suddenly was free from any aspiration or wish to accomplish anything. I had given it all up. There was only this immediate and gloriously unmediated understanding which virtually took possession of me.

Such wondrous flow. It was not me playing anymore, instead the music was playing me. The joy and immense sense of fulfillment to feel this music in my grasp felt like heaven on earth. Pure rapture.

I was both the Mirror and the Mirrored. The player and the played…


Know that we simply cannot achieve this direct and pervasive cognizance, despite all our aspirations and targeted effort.

This kingly guest has to come and bestow us when we are ready.

I have waited for almost three decades. For the gift of One…

How long are you prepared to wait…?


(S)he came disguised as a charming, most amiable, gorgeously looking young woman

You don´t want to know who…