A daunting truth

Not only that you get no encouragement in this outlandish pursuit, but they all vehemently oppose your endeavor to heal. Cause if you manage to, you will turn everything upside down, and thus not only will you heal and awake others, but you will expose and overthrow all the stinking lies the whole present society holds onto since times immemorial.

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About julienmatei
I feel an inner urge to express what I see, to communicate and share with others all these impressions. Often the things I see are there, not yet manifest, but waiting... to be observed, talked about, and embraced. These new insights need another approach, a more vivid curiosity... Due to fear and prejudice we prefer to see only "the official" truth - but THE OFFICIAL TRUTH IS DEAD - being dead, it has nothing to give... We can continue pretending Death is fascinating or... we can take the trouble to LIVE... THE NEW has no definition yet... Again, IT requires another "perception", the courage to apprehend everything differently, from a totally new angle, with new confidence and inquisitive touch. This blog is not about interesting concepts, it is about participation... finding new solutions, inspiration, togetherness.

8 Responses to A daunting truth

  1. TBS says:

    Fascinating concept. I too have operated under this presumption for some ‘time’ now. Recently, though, there seems to have been a shift.

    I started wondering…and challenging my own perception. I wondered, “Who is this ‘me’ that supposes that these ‘others’ oppose ‘my healing’?” … “What is this ‘healing’ that the ‘me’ supposes is necessary?” … “What is the ‘difference’ between ‘my own’ vehement drive to ‘find healing’, and the perceived vehement opposition to it?” … “How does ‘my’ insistence that seeking and travail are necessary in a quest for peace differ from ‘their’ insistence that there is something ‘wrong’ with me for engaging in such a quest?” And, in my view, maybe the most important wondering of all, “What if all my seeking actually prevents the discovery of that which I seek?”

    Lately I have seen two things at play in my experience and perception: (1) exhaustion, and (2) some intentional choice to sit still and shut up. Thus, I have ‘found’ some of the things for which I had, with determination, searched. Right here. Within. I no longer concern myself with the stuff that I had judged to be the judgment of others who I had insisted were opposed to my peace.

    Peace is what when I quit squirming. Forgiveness is what when I gave up all hope for a better ‘past’. Confidence and ease are what as I surrender the idea that the course and well-being of the ‘future’ somehow depends on me and my wonderful power.

    I am seeing a unity…a oneness…that has not ever been evident to me (at least not in my recollection or ‘awareness’). This vision draws me to a realization that I am you, and you are me, and we are all those who seem to be opposed to our desires for and dreams of peace. I AM the ‘other person’ that SEEMS not to want me to heal. I AM already healthy and connected. The more I allow the scales of illusion to fall from my eyes, the more I am able to see that Peace IS…Health IS… I AM.

    But what do I know, right?

    • julienmatei says:

      If my safety is to wallow in conflict and enmity, in strife and the frustration of it, if I am used to fight for survival and thus live in constant shortage, thus fearing and fighting the other, if everything I have built on has been the outcome of sorrow and resistance, no matter how sick and perverted the pursuit, THIS IS THE WORLD I HAVE TOTALLY INVESTED MYSELF IN…

      Imagine that this sickness is disturbed by someone who offers another “healthier” perspective,
      which is totally divergent with my specific way of apprehending the world. Shall I willingly admit that I have squandered my life in a nonsensical sham, or will I discard your vision for disturbing mine?…

      If my safety is to have been ill, – which implies hurting myself and the other – do you think that I will buy into your offer to heal me?…

      Irrespective how erred my worldview, I will vehemently fight for my right to not change…

      Isn´t the current situation of the world, above depicted?…

      To give you a hint:

      I went to a cafe yesterday. There was a nice girl working there. There were not so many clients so we had a chance to converse. There was no flirt, we simply found a nice soul connection. We easily resonated with one another. Some relaxing Buddha bar music permeated the whole atmosphere. There was peace in the air. Delight. Long story short:

      Her boss showed up out of the blue, and the moment he laid eyes on me, he said some nasty words. He was terribly infuriated…so unaccountably aggressive. Why? I HAD DISTURBED THE ORDER HE IS USED TO…I swear to God, he would have killed me if he could, so incredibly pissed off he was…

      Today I went to the same spot. You could have hardly believe it: the girl who yesterday was so alive and sweet, looked like a shadow, as if she was short of air…

      As there was some humdrum noise being played, I asked amiably whether she could play some lounge music.

      `”I AM NOT ALLOWED”…she muttered reproachfully.

      I´d got it:

      Happiness and harmony not only don´t sell, but are too much of a menace…

      So I don´t know:

      Am I the other person who is afraid of and seems to not want to heal?
      Really, hard to say…

      • TBS says:

        I hear/feel you, Julien. Been there, done that. It still seems to happen sometimes.

        I know I could be totally (or at least partially) delusional, but I’ve stopped asking my self whether or not I am the other person (who is asking this of whom?). I’ve started pondering the possibility that there is not an ‘other person’.

        I’m glad that we got to enjoy some resonance and sweet conversation with relaxing Buddha bar music permeating the atmosphere. Flirting with oneness.

        Yes. Happiness and harmony are menacing non-sellers — in some (apparent) circumstances. And beautiful, free, soothing gifts in others. I wonder what happens when we put them all together. =)

        I don’t know, either. And that’s okay with me.

      • TBS says:

        Oh…and thank you for sharing.

      • julienmatei says:

        I’ve started pondering the possibility that there is not an ‘other person’ – you say.

        As it happens, things have been rather strained these last days, so in order to heal, I´ve been “prompted” to internalize this very truth, unfolding the verity of this all the way inside me…What I saw and projected outside, had to look at inside of me…Hidden guilt – the most inaccessible thing to unveil…

      • TBS says:

        Love and Light to you, my brother from another mother. This thing that I call “I” appreciates that thing that I call “YOU”. “We” are eternally and inseparably bound in The Oneness. Thanks again!

      • julienmatei says:

        Hugs from the “Romanian” you then :))

      • TBS says:

        Quite amazing, yes. Hugs…

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