I didn´t have a choice

“When you have a dream, and the dream isn´t something you dream and then it happens, but the dream is something you never knew it was going to come into your life, dreams always come from behind you, not right between your eyes, it sticks up on you, but when you have a dream, it doesn´t come out at you screaming in your face “this is Who You Are, this is What You Must Be for the rest of your life”…


The hardest thing to listen to, namely your instincts, your human personal intuition, always whispers, it never shouts; it´s very hard to hear.

You have to every day of your lives be ready to hear what whispers in your ear, it very rarely shouts. And if you can listen to the whisper, and if it takes all your heart, and it´s something you think you wanna do for the rest of your life, and that is going to be what you do for the rest of your life, we will benefit from everything you do.”

– Stephen Spielberg

It is not the critic who counts

It is not the critic who counts;
not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles,
or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,
whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;
who strives valiantly;
who errs,
who comes short again and again,
because there is no effort without error and shortcoming;
but who does actually strive to do the deeds;
who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions;
who spends himself in a worthy cause;
who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement,
and who at the worst, if he fails,
at least fails while daring greatly,
so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls
who neither know victory nor defeat.”

– Theodore Roosevelt

(Through T)

Man of today – a shameless and infantile narcissist

Jack Saunsea:
“If we do not stop to see through our thoughts (thoughts of course are also words, most of the time) then it is like we are talking to ourselves non-stop and never take the time to listen to what the world around us is saying.”

Truth of the matter is that the “modern” man takes Thought and Idea for life,
to such a degree that life itself becomes a constant threat to keep away from.

Thus the ceaseless thinking and talking, this non-stop inner noise, makes
impossible a true and unmediated contact with the living, to the extent that
everything has become fake…Nothing feels real anymore.

Such a curse: life is not life, life is what I think it is…– such shamless and infantile narcissism.

He sees nothing, he hears nothing. He is not even aware that he is on the verge of ruining himself.

His ideas are “alive” while he – the real man – is dead.

Listen, do, and let go…

– Your self-awareness must be exhausting, he gathered.
– Why do you think so? – I replied.
– By focusing on so many processes and thoughts of meanings to your life and experience, as well as actually living in the moment – with so much enveloping you at any time…it must be tiring.

Fact of the matter is that I no longer feel any tiredness.

In fact, everything is ineffably “easy”. Ease and easily delightful…

A weightless flow of sorts…

It has become so easy cause I don´t cling to anything I know. 

I look through whatever I have accomplished as if it´s done by someone else.
I write a text and immediately after, I let go of it. I totally disidentify from it.

When I am about to “know” or do something, Life gives me a sign…
Life kind of thinks inside of me, not “me”. Consequently everything has become 
effortless act. I only hear what´s beeing told within.

And I listen with care and willfully follow what´s being whispered. That´s the way
I go about with anything:


Life is harsh to most people not because of the practical aspects, but because they are weighed down by their thoughts, by time, by fear…

Disunity and isolation – the greatest Illusion of them all

The body itself, the flesh and blood of us, wants lots of things, food, warmth,,,then the ego individual of us wants recognition, comfort, status, in short whatever feels good…… but if there is a part of us that says, “all fine and good, and even necessary, but is there not more?” then things become shaky and uncomfortable.

I think depressions, addictions and such, either come from the ego who is not satisfied with ego wanting, or it can also come from the spirit of a person who is searching for more than ego satisfactions, in other words a soul who seeks a meaning to life itself, asks the big questions, …..like what is that spark of consciousness who is conscious of itself and yet feels so isolated? Longing for a greater unity?

The point is:

WHO in us feels isolated?…How come we feel isolated in a Universe which is anything but “isolated”…? This Isolation we feel, is it true…? Or eventually Isolation is Fear – this terrible illusion which is taken for true by millions of people.

This Illusion of isolation is the terrible dream of disunity,
of Unhappiness
– can you see that?

Think it over:

Who is uncomfortable, who in us wants “more”… is there such thing as “more” when you are at ease, completely present and absorbed in What is? – that is, when you are Unity, at one with all there is?

Can you see that this entity who dreams the dream of Isolation is Ego…?

All depressions, addictions, satisfaction-craving, entitlement-issues is Ego – dissatisfaction remaining dissatisfied no matter what…

There is meaning-seeking as long there is Ego…- that because Ego as such is a total failure, spooky meaninglessness ultimately.

It is Ego asking “the big questions”, whereas in reality from the perspective of Self, of the true Spirit, there are no questions – because:

WHO is there to ask? And who is there to answer…?

The key to it all – Wonder

Aniketan K :
What else can be the ultimate source other than Self? How all these
manifestations to know thySelf? Wonder!

That´s it: Wonder.

You see, to be honest, I can take more inspiration from watching a sparrow, or from observing in great detail all the shades of light and shadow, than being together with people…It is sad, because true togetherness is a blessed thing…

Unfortunately, people in the West purposely lead a boring and terribly shallow
life, keeping at due distance anything which reminds them of a truly lived life

Life is unfathomable wonder, but humans simply discard this simple but overarching truth…

How that is possible, why they refuse to be moved and be alive is actually
the question I ponder on most

If you want to know, you have to even let go of your yearning

My process has been one of realizing that my deepest yearning is to deepen my experience from moment to moment of what I (and many others) call the NOW. This space of the NOW, for me, has the meaning of entering each new moment in this mysterious life with an untouched direct perception, not tinged by past experiences, be they pleasant or painful. It also means to not waver from this immersion in this NOW and entertain mental images about what we call the “future”.

What many people call “now” is oftentimes another illusion.
NOW has nothing to do with “yearning”, “deepening” or “experience”.
The hardest one is that if we yearn, we will have even more yearning but not the object of yearning…
Now is inconsistent as It exists in non-existing.

It is like trying to seize a dream. How can we then long for something non-existent?

Can experience ever know anything about something which is totally unknown,
outside its “tinged” range of perception?

When we become immediately aware of this subtle insight, only then
What Is Beyond Dream can make Itself known.

Failing is mostly taken for success

For most people failing is the greatest success.

So many are irreversibly caught in formidable self-deceit. They persistently
claim to be well and thrive, yet you can evidently witness how they headlong are rushing
downwards to perdition.

You try to warn them. One, two, ten times… – they wouldn´t hear.
Not only that they bluntly refuse, but often pompously play superior, poke fun at you,
turning your words into derision. So you give up, leaving them to their destiny.

It doesn´t take long before you hear that some of these people, either are involved in a terrible car accident, fall ill in a life-threatening disease, commit suicide or die in totally unforeseen circumstances.

I am aware that it is baffling, but the underlying reason behind these people´s misfortunes
It feels that many of them unconsciously wanted to die. I have many examples, but what it comes to my mind now is the death of a good friend of mine, incredibly skilled musician, who passed away some months ago, only 34 years old. I found it very difficult to write about him at that time, but I will do so with another occasion.

Anyhow, I have understood that despite claiming otherwise, surprisingly many people
don´t really want to live, finding reasons to eschew themselves, ultimately undermining their lives.

The thing is, however, that eventually you can help only those ones who expressly ask for help.
With the others you waste your time trying to back or help them. It is pointlessly draining you of your life-force too.

Their chosen destiny seems to be total failing and disaster, and you have no other choice than letting them tread this fateful way to utter downfall.

Meaning, The Mirror of Now

What is this thing called Future?… It is hope, fear, expectation, doubt, uncertainty, frustration… In short, future is ideal and fear of ideal. Will it happen, will it not…?”, “what happens next?”, “what´s the next step, how shall I proceed with this or that?”

I won´t induce in philosophical speculation, I just wonder: What if future didn´t exist? What would happen if we took a healthy choice and eliminate “future” at least for a while…?

The consequence of this would be unimaginable: If there is no future there would be no ideal either. No ideal – no fear.

Yes, future means basically projection, doens´t it?…No future – no fear – no projection. What is projection? Projection means that we give ourselves away. We give our force away, our hopes, vitality, strength and fears to something uncertain basically.  What if we took home all projections, projecting them on this very moment…? For sure, we would retrieve ourselves in this very second…- we would start being real, being exactly how we are.

WE HAVE INVENTED THE FUTURE BECAUSE WE FEAR THIS MOMENT! Our fear to find out what or who we are, has become “future”. There is no future! Future is fear!

When we let go of the fear, future and projection, we begin to perceive Now in unfathomable ways – this present moment will start reveal a beauty, mystery and richness beyond measure. Every single thing will mean something. You will start having a right relation both to yourself and with things around you. You start perceiving YOUR INTRINSIC MEANING. Your immediate perception of your specific meaning is your greatest asset, your richness. You will find peace. Clarity. You will do less but achieve more.

Have you ever wondered why people are so greedy and poor inside always going around complaining?…Because their life usually is devoid of sense. They irretrievably look for meaning and fulfillment in the future… But Meaning never resides in the future…Only fear does…

We never live in the future, we live now, don´t we…? Only Now knows the secret of Our Meaning. Meaning means Fulfillment.

What is living – a comment

That is indeed the biggest problem with “modern” man today – he doesn´t really live.

What it´s worse is that he fears life. All pursuits he undertakes derive from this basic deep existential fear, he invariably banishes himself from his own life perpetually refusing to confront his real nature.

This constant escaping from himself he calls “life”. Someone who is always on the run, cannot be expected to take any real responsibility for anything, and thus whatever he does is shallow and superficial – despite generic skills and competence he remains an ignorant, his “success” means only destruction, all in all, never knowing in depth what Life or Love is, he fails totally albeit his “grand”achievements.

His so-called life means isolation, pointless struggle, sorrow, boredom and confusion. Inside of him he knows that, but due to his incredible arrogance he never admits this fact.

So what is really living…?

Living is “know thyself”. Living is finding out WHO YOU ARE. Living is finding out what Fear and Separation is about.

Living is responsibility – that is, the ability to respond comprehensively and substantially to WHO YOU REALLY ARE.