Citeva rinduri pentru Adina

Toata drama de zi cu zi, cu toate frictiunile si conflictele ei aferente, este indubitabil, reala. Este “reala” pentru ca suntem cu totu´prinsi in ea. Suntem personajele si victimele povestii noastre individual-colective.
Suntem asa de identificati cu povestea asta nebuneasca, ii acordam toata atentia noastra nerezervata, incit nu suntem capabili sa vedem dincolo de perceptia noastra conditionata.

Noi suntem perceptia asta conditionata, asta credem si ALEGEM SA CREDEM.

Ei bine, lupta asta dementa cu toti si toate – repet, aparent unica si “reala” noastra realitate cotidiana, nu e decit perceptia conditionarii noastre… o iluzie…nimic altceva.

Stiu ca e greu si dureros ce zic, mai ales ca noi ne-am investit total in iluzia asta. Ca apa pentru peste, Iluzia este insasi Aerul pe care il respiram.

Daca vezi si intelegi asta, ei bine, insasi intelegerea acestui fapt te eliberaza.

Cind Iluzia e vazuta ca iluzie, in acel moment inefabil Viata adevarata – adica secunda asta neutrala care pulseaza acum, Tu-ul tau adevarat incepe sa ti se reveleze. Pur si simplu il vei simti.

Desidentificarea de iluzie va aduce initial frustrare si un vid teribil, dar daca nu renunti, curind vei cunoaste acea multumire si pace interioara care este Eu-l sau Tu-ul atemporal si adevarat.

Asta e singura si adevarata realitate, acest EU inexprimabil in cuvinte… Ca sa cunosti adevarata natura a acestui EU, nu trebuie sa fi nici calugar nici ascet…pur si simplu trebuie sa ai curajul si dorinta de a intelege iluzia ca fiind iluzie…

A mind-blowing synchronicity

I have a cousin, and unlike two other cousins from my mother´s side, we never had any real contact.
Her daughter, G. found me on Facebook some time ago, and apart from changing some kind of empty pleasantries we don´t really have much in common.

This girl looks like she has descended from a painting by Vermeer: she is tall, blonde, feminine, but kind of “odd-looking” – she doesn´t in the least have any common features, although you can´t deny her being attractive: her skin is rather pale, her nose subtly elongated, her eyes are light blue and ethereal, she never uses lipstick yet she has incredibly sensuous red lips. Like I said – a girl from another age. A girl whose looks are anything but mundane.

It was last week, Friday evening. It was raining, I was waiting for the bus. As usually, I was observing
the passersby. At one point I saw a young girl and I was totally taken aback…it was G. What on earth was she doing in Stockholm? I wanted to call her by name, but… when I looked closer, it was a girl looking strikingly like her…if our double exist, than that girl was G.´s doppelganger. Unbelievable resemblance…

Highly weird…It was some kind of sign with this – I just couldn´t figure it out what…

The day after, my friend Radu a 27-year-old friend of mine from Romania calls me. “Julien, do you have
a niece, blonde, very good-looking with blue eyes?” G. was fitting exactly into his description.

As life is unpredictable I thought he might have met her somewhere by chance. “Yes, I have” I answered him  “G. the daughter of my cousin. What – did you bump into each other or so…?”

That´s strange” he went on. “Last night I DREAMED YOU INTRODUCED ME TO YOUR NIECE, and she was a gorgeous girl with blue eyes…In the dream it felt as if I was together with her.”

I was speechless…Is this mind-blowing or what…? It starts with me seeing a girl strinkingly ressembling G. with whom I have no real contact, and the day after Radu dreams about her…?

What are the chances that such an unlikely amazing serendipity like this to happen…?

I chatted with G. the same day telling her about this uncommon episode with the doppelganger and Radu´s dream of her. I suggested to her, that this is A Destiny Call for her, that Radu might be maybe someone she would like to meet.

“Oh, but I have already a boy-friend”, she said with a rather condescending and priggish tone.

She admitted that this episode was strikingly unusual, but she totally failed to see the beauty and unlikeliness of it…Really – it was outrageous…She was not even slightly curious to see Radu although he is in my friend list on Facebook.

How can you be so stupid, dull and insensitive to ignore and bluntly refuse such a blessed synchronicity…?

In Chevalier's fictional account, the characte...

In Chevalier’s fictional account, the character Griet is the model for Vermeer’s painting. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)synchronicity?  It might be so…that Radu could have been the love of her life…

She might realize later on in life that she can have missed the train to Happiness.

Who knows…?

Indeed, it is my duty to speak up

This is a highly important dialogue about the fact that the Nobel Prise committee has decided to assign the Peace Prise to European Union.

Richard: Well, you surely got the right to get upset with this. But it’s not your duty.

Me: Who´s duty is it?
To assign the Peace Prise to an idea is insanity,
and when this idea is also bankrupt – well – this is serious business, don´t you think…?

Richard: It’s nobody’s duty. It’s only your Ego which is outflanking you to make a statement in order to proof your being.
I don’t care about this assignment because you will find as many arguments
pro as contra …. if you really investigate it. And it is part of politics – who would claim that politics are logical?

Me: Nobody´s duty?…What kind of reasoning is this? Because politics is illogical, and also due to the fact that people don´t really care, do I have to shut up as well…? It happened before: people didn´t bother, failing to consider blatant facts, so by their tacit consent, they made possible for dictators like Hitler, Stalin, and other evil lunatics to come to power.

Are we supposed to lay back and swallow outrage?… I consider it is my duty to speak out, as I find this very serious. Why should I waste my time on things that have no consequence? I have no wish whatsoever to make a statement in order to proof anything. When it comes to this specific assignment, I don´t find any arguments pro or contra…
This decision IS utterly stupid – and what´s more – very dangerous in the long run.

As I already pointed out, it enhances and justifies a bankrupt idea, in the detriment of the human element. If they had given the price TO A CERTAIN PERSON, I would have kept my mouth shut.

Why is it dangerous? Because dissociating idea from the human element is the beginning of evil… When the idea is more important than Man himself, it means that human beings are arbitrarily reduced to easily removable and dispensable entities, as only The Idea counts. “We are the leaders, we have the Right Ideas so you better subordinate yourself to this.”

To make my point, I will just mention that nobody in the West cared about what happened at the referendum in Romania this summer when almost 9 million people!! voted against the president of the country, but European Union shamelessly called this
coup d´etat, totally ignoring more than half of the voting population, helping this highly corrupt and controversial impostor to remain at his post. Is this democracy to sustain an immoral crook of a president and his acolytes against the majority of people´s voice?

Is this something to be overlooked? I hardly think so…
It seems maybe as a far-fetched exaggeration, but nobody takes seriously the beginning of dictatorship before it becomes a fact.

Hitler and Stalin had also very strong beliefs, they were convinced of the power
and righteousness of their ideas  – so in their madness they found appropriate and justifiable to relentlessly kill millions of people.

To conclude:

Dissociating idea from the human element is the beginning of pure evil…When Idea is more important than Man, we are in big trouble.

Five times ONE

Just got back home in Stockholm after having been away for a month in Romania and then Rome, Italy. I hope I will have the energy and inspiration to be able to write about the incredible things I´ve been through this month.

I just write this post though as I can´t conceal my astonishment:

Just checked my dashboard and saw that Mirrors of Encounters has had exactly 11, 111 visitors  – I don´t know what that means, but powerful it is…five times ONE…!!

Anyone of you knowing what numerological significance this amazing number has?

No, I am not the only one to see

I just received this mail from my friend Meli. As it happens she is just 25 years old, but despite her young age, she sees with dispassionate clear eyes the factual state of the Western world today. I am indeed immensely grateful as she confirms through her lines the truth of what I have long pondered on: modern man runs away from his emotions. It is quite striking as she speaks as if it was me writing. It shows that I am not the only one observing what is concretely happening around us:

“I think what is happening right now in our post-industrialized/capitalist countries is something we call “Entfremdung” in German, alienation in English!

WE DON´T KNOW WHO WE ARE ANYMORE, WE ARE NOT LISTENING TO OUR FEELINGS ANY LONGER  (we don´t know anymore how emotions work)… We are alienated from each other because we have forgotten how it is to have real interactions with each other, we are even afraid of that.

Communication and social behaviour is such an important part of our lives but we tend to do it less and less. Everything is uniformed. We eat the same shit, buy the same shit, do the same ….
Look at all these chain restaurants and coffee shops, McDonald’s, Starbucks – I think these places exist as a result of this ubiquitous alienation. People work as slaves in uniforms, people don´t respect them anymore. You sell the same shit everywhere. Sorry for that!

In the end, I don´t know where this should lead to. I am actually afraid of people here. For the last three weeks I was in Poland for a summer school and I think there people still know how to interact, how to talk to each other with respect and moral. Same in Romania. But in Germany, people are cold, egoistic. I don´t like it anymore.
My friends say that I am not right, they don´t see this. But I can feel it, sadly.

PS I am staying in a youth hostel in Leipzig today: I just see around people not talking to each other anymore, instead they´re trying out their new app on their smartphones. What the fuck…?

Relations, whishes and deliberateness – why certain people make it and others not

I have a friend. Her name is Lili. She is not the most beautiful or most unattractive woman around. In fact she is fairly good-looking. Tall, gentle, elegant, she kind of stands out. She is well-educated, you can always have a sensible discussion with her. You can feel though that she has some kind of emotional issues. You can almost sense her sadness. Perhaps, due to emotional uncertainty, she can be at times rigid, not cold, but somehow rather distant.

Being a teacher, she is well read. She is up to date in psychology, she is acquainted with books about personal growth – kind of stuff.

Her 73 years old mother, is a lady of the old. Rather harsh, she is the kind of opinionated person, friendly but rather bigoted, she knows nothing about books or “self-realization”.

She finds intellectual pursuit superfluous, a total waste of time.

Anyway, to come to the point of my story, the husband of the “iron lady” died some three years ago. They had been married for thirty or forty years maybe.

Two months after the funeral, still in the period of “grieving”, she told Lili that she is not going to accept being by her own, that she wants to meet another man. Believe or not, one month later she had met mr. Paul, – a widower around her age. This man appears to be a reliable, practical man – EXACTLY WHAT SHE SAID SHE NEEDED – and they still are together enjoying each others company.

Now, this happens in Romania where the mentality is very restricting and obtuse when it comes to elderly widows finding another partner. How they could meet, God knows… – like many other elderly people in Romania this woman doesn´t attend to any social activities, she doesn´t have a circle of friends, she is either home or going to the market.

Lili, on the other hand, has had one bad relation after another. After her divorce from a total irresponsible dork, for the last ten years she hasn´t been able to find a decent man. She bumps into all kind of weirdos, uninteresting men of no integrity who use and take advantage of her. Despite her reading all these Books of Attraction and “self-realization” stuff, her emotional life is a flop after another.

She claims that her most ardent wish is – of course – to find a man for a meaningful relation. The fact is that the more she tries the worse it gets, and she becomes gradually more and more unhappy and frustrated.

To make a parallel with a male friend of mine, again, this man is sensitive – maybe too sensitive – honorable, very special, but since his divorce 8 years ago, although he expresses a clear wish for a relation, he is still by himself becoming more and more restless and puzzled.

My question is:

How is it possible that these two persons – Lili and my male friend – despite being two nice and special people don´t ever seem to find a suitable partner, whereas Lili´s mother – a simple, uneducated, not particularly charming, rather uncouth person – decides to have a man, and finds him…?

What is the mechanism behind this?

It seems to me that everything in this life is about Clear Intention. Deliberateness. Again, Lili´s mother asserted clearly that she wanted a man and she got him. Whereas Lili and my friend state clearly that they want badly a partner, but never find one.

WHY DON´T THEY FIND SOMEONE? Now comes the most uncommon answer:

BECAUSE DEEP DOWN IN THEIR SOUL THEY DON´T WANT A RELATION. It is obvious – their subconscious opposes flagrantly their wish.

Can it be so that behind their “struggling” after a relation, is in fact another obscure reason which they don´t manage to see or verbalize…? Can it be so that both of them somehow hide and don´t have the right relation with themsleves…and cannot admit this…?

It happens also to me to want badly one thing, to realize that it was not that particular thing I yearned for, but something else!!…But to discern the real motive behind, takes an incredible strength and ability to scrutinize yourself. The ego refuses to examine himself, and the more book knowledge you have, the more cunning the ego becomes, sabotaging you constantly till you are ready to really look within.

To “know” something is hell many times. Many intellectuals´ life is a total fiasco. Sometimes – like the elderly lady – it is better to be less “emancipated”, with other words “single-minded” but deliberately aware of your ardent wishes.


PS Guess who just phoned me just one minute right after ending this post? Lili, of course. We haven´t talked in almost two months. If this is not telepathy I don´t know what is…

A break in Romania

So my friends,

Let me tell you that I am presently in Romania visiting my mother. I left Stockholm yesterday, needing a break from the limiting, frustrating and evil conformity with its constant absence of life, which is the everyday menu in Sweden.

So here I am, in my childhood city – Ploiesti. I have to confess that I wanted to take a well deserved break from Mirrors of Encounters too, but I just couldn’t keep these reflections away from being written down here.

This is an unfortunate valid truth everywhere, but something which you can flagrantly feel even more in this country :

Many people’s life is a frustrated constant struggle to survive. After so many years of reckless communism, they no longer know who they are. Due to a blatant lack of self-knowledge, they usually have no clarity, sense of order or understanding of the mechanics of Life. That’s the reason why, despite talent and ingenuity they fail mostly in whatever they enterprise. Failure has become some kind of virtue here.

It is evident – many are afraid to dream. ‘I am afraid to see how rich and irresistibly interesting life is.” Since many’s  knowledge of life is conditioned by the narrow frame of chaos and inertia of failure, they don’t trust that they can also succeed.

So they continue with what they know best : distrusting any new or healthy different way of looking at life, as if “different” doesn’t exist in the dictionary, they continue with the same mentality of suspicion and ill-founded fear,
all in all, due to a twisted and sick mentality, they are stuck in the obtuse identity of a loser.

A “loser” can never succeed, irrespective of the effort, hard work or ingenuity he puts in a project. It is evident that an unhealthy self-image, cannot be counteracted by any effort, talent or deliberateness.

Consequently, as long as Self Image is not going to be an individual and collective priority, most people’s life are going to remain a senseless struggle, a scary “shadow land”.