Human nature

They turn everything into distance, into an unreachable object of desire, in order to continue their agonizing dream of separation.

In plain English, Suffering is man´s utmost Love.

The insane ego pondering

“My worst fear is that I am you…like you…in relation with you. So I fiercely refuse to admit that we are One – that we share the same Drama…- that your pain, loss and problems are also mine.

I thus obsessively empower and re-enact my being SO different from you, so that I can maintain the magical lie of being special – that is, separated from you.

Don´t you ever come near me.

DISTANCE IS MY VERY NAME”

As Fear is my Idea of Succes, I am entitled to defend my fear

Zoe:
“It is difficult to define oneself without thinking in terms of separation from a whole. If living an ego-less life means merging with others, then the collective consciousness as a ‘whole’ has to thus change as well. We are living in an age where the collective consciousness – the whole – has been replicated and replaced with a collective goal: Success.

Me:
Change occurs only when we understand the intrinsic nature of thought.

Where there is thinking, there is consequently separation. Strife. Competition.

Thought is the outcome of all yesterdays, that is, the constant reinforcing of past Experience. Experience is the derivative of Fear. Fear in its turn perpetuates itself through obsessively entertaining and struggling to enhance a false center: the separate ego.

Thinking creates the illusion of the separate ego. Thinking, basically is invariably defending its dreamed boundary: MINE.

Look at the relation between Mine, Fear, and Success.

What we term as “success” is intimately associated with a horrid misunderstanding, as it stems from and overstates the idea of conflict between me and you.

Can you see that “mine” and “me” is the beginning of suffering, and that basically ME – the separate ego – directly warrants my right to defend my fear? My suffering, my depression, my aggressiveness, my right to use violence against “you”.

As Love to me is just another side of fear, Fear is thus my God.

Yes…I am entitled to be violent against you as long as I defend my success – my distinct limit -, even if that means relinquishing you. Ultimately, I have the right to relinquish myself too, as long as I equate fear with success.

Can you finally tell me where this “me” and “mine” starts and ends?…
After all:

Is there a separate “me” without “you”, other than in the fabric of my illusion?

I call myself “me”, but you call me “you”… – really, at what point do I become “me” and when am I “you”?

https://julienmatei.com/2013/11/17/the-isolated-me-the-perpetrator-of-all-misfortune/?relatedposts_exclude=18155

We have to give up the false assumption that Life is Separateness

Life is never one-sided.

But our thought is. Likewise our perception of ourselves and everything around us.
That´s the main problem of thinking basically: I choose “this”, on the expense of “that”.

We can´t imagine that a thing is both “this and that”…

Our choice is uncritically taken as the only valid assumption. Meaning that we inertially take our deliberate option as “The Thing”. It is clear that whatever we observe is biased by our ingrained one-sidedness.

Either you are a scientist, or a poet. To be a poet and a scientist doesn´t make you a reliable professional.

If I as a musician paint, compose or write and have scientific interests besides, turns me automatically into a suspicious character.

Stupidity consists of many things, but in this context, stupidity is always one-sided.

In fact, the beginning of stupidity is to be found in the shameless presumption of “either-or”. Either down or up. Stay or go. Christian or Buddhist. The list can continue interminably…

Truth of the matter is that we are irrevocably stuck in either-or and neither-nor.
In vapid concepts. Language too, may be our curse.

Most assuredly, an apple is not a pear, of course, a man is not a woman.

The problem is that thinking suspends the Natural Unity of Life – it sees the apple totally separated from the pear, the child from the “grown-up”, the woman from man.

With other words, another insidious side of stupidity is to be stuck in category-thinking. Further on – and this is the most scary characteristic for most people:

STUPIDITY SEES NO RELATION BETWEEN THINGS.

This falling short of seeing things in intrinsic relation is appalling. It is actually our doom.

SEEING THINGS DISTINCTIVELY SEPARATED IS PURE INSANITY.

We are supposed to mount but not descend, win and never lose, act obsessively without relaxing, go away but never come back.

The worst outcome of this delirious misconception is Progress – as in economic growth.

Growth can also mean tumor. Isn´it obvious? – We have totally bought ourselves into maintaining and fueling disease. Everybody with common sense sees the relation between economic growth and sickness – growth as a rampant bloating of fragmentation and disunity.

“Day-living” is our only zany answer. Night – as a metaphor for Mystery and Unknowing, the zone where our definitions are invalid – scares us. Too spooky. Too uncontrollable. 

This stupid idea of separateness has turned our life into an unbearable and absurd wasteland. In the absence of the Ineffable – the Wholeness of Being – and due to becoming explicitly rational, human relations have been ruined: man has become woman´s worst foe, and woman man´s worst nightmare.

Not being able to relax and come back to themselves, people live in total agony. Not being IN RELATION to anything, they cut themselves off from any reasonable living.

Lonely wretched strangers going nowhere.

To conclude.

Everything falls back to a wrong perception of Life.

Namely, THE ONE-SIDEDNESS OF THOUGHT, which breeds Separation, Fragmentation and Lack of Relation.

Fragmentation is the sickness of the Soul.

The enormously stupid and baleful assumption that Life is Separation is our death sentence.

There is not much of an option. We have to renounce this disastrous delusion and heal, embracing Wholeness.

Everything is in vivid relation to everything.

Is marriage a blessing or a curse?

 Culturemonk:
“What do you think? Are long-term friendships, marriages and other such possible?

What is the key to making them work?”

My comment:
I am being really honest here, I don´t know why “marriage” was invented at all. My mother in her moments of lucidity admits that “marriage is like a barrel: on the top honey, underneath shit.” Really, the marital institution doesn´t rhyme at all with life´s natural course.

It is an affront against common sense.

I have seen all too many examples: married couples remaining together due to fear and habit, due to a false sense of security, often, due to sheer cowardice. Of course, my words would surely be found offensive by all traditionalists, but I simply don´t care.

Why love a single person throughout your life…?

This sounds utopian, but If we had a sane and healthy community where Truth and Emotional Nearness would prevail, we wouldn´t make such an unnatural and crazy commitment to a single person. We would naturally love, enjoy and take care of each other, without written contracts or stupid egotic boundaries.

Everyone knows this, but they all refuse to acknowledge:

MAN IS NOT CREATED TO BE MONOGAMOUS…

EGO IS THE ROOT TO ALL EVIL and marriage is the institution where Ego and Separation is promulgated by law…
Marriage is where all violence, bigotry and conflict arises: “us against them”…My family, my clan, my nation…-ego, ego, ego…

As long as man restricts himself to live in the narrow limits of his ego, married or
not married, he will turn this life into hell.

Parasitism versus Humanity to others

Ubuntu is an ancient African word meaning ‘humanity to others’. It also means
I am what I am because of who we all are‘.

He:
“If I was to practice ubuntu, every parasite in my community would exploit,
abuse and misuse me.”

Me:
I HAVE BEEN CONFRONTED WITH THIS MYSELF, so I will not be playing with
words here, for the sake of indulging in inane sophistry.

The question is this:

Who wants really to abuse and misuse you?

Let´s take a look:

Who is the parasite?…
WHAT turns him into a parasite? Why is he obsessively reinforcing this behaviour?
Is he the torturer or the victim? Or both…?

You say: “I aspire to ubuntu, but I have strict boundaries.”

Isnt it so? Everyone who aspires has strict boundaries.

If you aspire to ubuntu, – in fact, to anything – you create a distance between you and that very “ideal”. You aspire, it means you are not there; as long as you act according to an agenda, you have to defend this “aspiring” CREATING STRICT BOUNDARIES.

Can you see the inherent conflict? Defending yourself from whoever, creates conflict,
as you defend your ideal, your right to become something. You are defending an
imaginary virtue – YOUR IDEA. In this case, your idea of Ubuntu.

Conflict is created by the Ideal itself. IDEAL IS IDEA!

Our so-called virtue, our very aspiring is the Parasite we are not willing to acknowledge.
Where there is conflict, becoming and aspiring, inherently we will find this awful Parasite…
It is within you, within us all…

Where there is Ideal, there is aspiration, separation, there is struggling, there is parasitism.

Love does never need “to become”…Love does not need an agenda as where
there is Love, everything is enacted naturally..

Wherever there is Love, there is Ubuntu.

Only the nameable can be stated, never ther highest reality

WE MAY KNOW WHAT ONENESS ENTAILS, GIVEN WE LET GO OF MIND NOW.

She:
Letting go of mind” is my priority, my focus. Intellectually, I get what you are saying. We’ve all had many moments out of Time and Mind, so what makes it so “difficult” to “stay” there? I am driven by the fact that I know my Liberation is already accomplished; my most frequent mode is to be grateful and just float in Awareness, watching the illusory fall away. Gratefully, I know nothing, am sure of nothing, am empty and waiting to be filled. I strobe in and out of Awareness, yet I am at Home in Heaven. Just observing as the lies fade away.

Me:
Quite a synchronicity. As it happens, I wrote this little post the other day about understanding:

“If you say you understand it intellectually, it means that you don´t understand it at all.”

If you are hungry, no matter how intellectually I would depict a great dinner for you, that wouldn´t help you, so I´d better give you a piece of bread, to still your hunger.

Intellect is like depicting a dinner. Reality is that we have to eat…- well, at least
in this dimension. 🙂

You have to be really hungry in order to understand. I am not implying you are not. I am just emphasizing that when Mind claims to understand, it totally misunderstands the whole thing.

Mind is misconception, as it directly derives from separation. What is separated can never see anything clearly.

You know that the egoic mind is very cunning. It can give itself as the highest authority. Practically, time and again, we fall victims of our projections and self-delusions.

Illusion is incredibly skilful to pass as Truth. We can think we are Home, but that can be just another subtle self-deception.

EGO IS VERY SHREWD!! Ego can play God, I think you know that by now…

Liberation is not a static goal, something to strive for. Self doesn´t have a clear address, that´s why “priority” and “focus” cannot never “yield” it, cause then we indulge in sheer dualistic thinking. Priority and focus are just some other names for projection.

We have all glimpses, but we cannot “stay there”. Ego turns everything alive into a memory to possess!! ONLY THE NAMEABLE CAN BE STATED, NEVER THE HIGHEST REALITY WHICH HAS NO NAME.

So:

“Letting go of my mind” is Mind fooling itself…Let go of “priority”, let go of focus, let go of any intent, cause that empowers the mind´s conditioning.

Just impartially observe.

Related articles: https://julienmatei.com/2013/06/07/can-we-ever-silence-the-mind/