Only the un-fragmented – Love – can heal us from gloom and depression

He says:
“Understanding the problem is half of the solution. Not trying to ‘overcome’ depresssion makes me feel that I am not striving towards making progress as a person. Yes I can see your point. If one is constantly striving for progress without being satisfied in the present state of self, one is always living for a future self. Since the notion progress is elusive and since there is always a possibility of further progress one will never reach at the future self one is projecting. As a consequence one will never be satisfied and hence won’t accept oneself. Let me accept my self as I am. We all are imperfect; then why are you so worried?

Me:
I will make a short detour in order to make my point, which is anything but speculation:

Are there different degrees in Love?

Is Love a matter of “more” or “less”? – Or can it be so that True Loving is an intrinsic act of totality?

What do we know about totality when our approach to Life is strictly fragmentary? We do live fragmentarily, don´t we?, our so-called awareness to everything being conditioned by the gap between different fragments, can you see that?

The gap – which is fear – is our real problem, that fragmented relation to Life is our daily bread.

Consequently, we live in  Fear, as we are always “half the way” to anything, meaning that we are never “total” in none of our undertakings.

Now, if our understanding was pervasive, there would be a total solution too.

Quite logical – half of the solution is being rendered by the half of our understanding.

If you really envisaged my point, you would grasp that what you call “striving toward progress” here, is nothing but creating a bigger and bigger gap between your different inner fragments, or conflicts.

You are thus motivated by the maintaining of the conflict – moving from fear to another fear – which gives you a sense of “progress”.

That´s unfortunately what progress means for most people – holding to and maintaining the conflict, because they imagine that the absence of conflict would make them stagnate.

You see, “let me accept myself as I am” is but a verbal subterfuge, if you choose to stick with half of the truth.

We are neither perfect nor imperfect.

We have actual reasons to worry when we live in half measures, because that will maintain the gap – our fear.

Only the un-fragmented – Love – can heal us from gloom and depression. Only the act of total understanding can save us from living in fear, conflict and despondency.

Freedom is not a result

Freedom is the starting point.
Freedom is your very breath this moment.

Thus, a real solution has to emerge now.

Whatever promise that doesn´t reinforce itself now,
is another lie.

Divine hopelessness

You come to a point when whatever you undertake is fruitless. No matter the passion, good will or effort you put into that particular action, you see no real outcome. Indeed, very frustrating. Time after another, you feel defeated by some kind of relentless fate. The more you try, the less you achieve.

What do you do…? To act is hopeless, inaction is no answer either. In plain language,
to do or not to do, doesn´t change a thing…You´re powerless. Stuck. You can´t solve the problem.
You just don´t find the right solution. The utter futility of human endeavour.

In this powerlessness, something happens. You are ready to surrender. To accept whatever it is, the way it is. You realize your limit. Surrender to what is, is unspeakable sorrow, as you no longer can flee your sorrow.
You can try to flee, but whatever you do, whoever you meet – your sorrow will be mirrored back to you…

Deliberately facing this hopeless loneliness is the hardest blow to Ego. You meet Fear,
you meet your Separation. Projection is no longer a choice.
In fact, nothing is a choice. Surrendering to this horrific helplessness is the key.

You give up, you let go, you let life. You trust…You are now free to let Soul whisper…There isn´t anything to do, but LISTEN…

Just listen.

About dissatisfaction and search for a solution

She:

I have a counter question for you. What would you say to a person who cannot find any solid reason for dissatisfaction while feeling it acutely, who searches for something without knowing what it is?

Me:

That is the hardest issue to come to terms with: to identify the seemingly un-identifiable.

Of course we can find innumerable reasons for feeling this acute dissatisfaction; but even if we knew and could clearly define what it is we are dealing with,
it would make no difference – the inner reality would still remain the same, the same discontent lurks invariably, and sooner or later we would still have to face it…

Easier said than done…I speak from own experience…

When it finds itself in pain, the mind is hardly searching for a way out of the problem, a solution… – but every solution the mind has in store, reinforces the inner conflict, as whatever solution is within the range of “the old,” every solution is with other words, constant reiteration of  ”the known”…Understand that whatever we know is old. Knowledge, and the instruments of our knowledge – definitions, names, rules, different approaches – are dead things…

Now – how can something old understand and validate something ever new and alive like your dissatisfaction…? Stay with my words for a second…and ponder…

It boils down to this: The mind is frantically searching to solve the problem It itself has created. It is like quenching the fire with fire. It is a paradox: Attempting intensely to find a solution, worsens the problem, as trying to solve it means escaping the problem…If you’re stuck  in quicksand the more you move the worse it gets…

So I come back to my initial question:

“Can I, can you – venture to lovingly confront and stay with this ache without trying to flee from it…?”

Staying with this ache in full awareness and non-selective Presence, is to be with the problem, sincerely and indiscriminately connecting to it, living with it, loving it like a wounded child…In due time, when understanding that it is no point in fleeing, you will hear something…Something like a whisper from inside, something very subtle which will give you spontaneous answers…It can be very simple things… – out of this intimate contact, the most common things will feel like wondrous novelty – a step, a glance, drinking a glass of water…it doesn´t matter what…

Don´t have any expectations yet, follow the process step by step for the time being.
After you have acquired the skill of unconditional inner listening, you will know undoubtedly what it all is about…

Don’t see your dissatisfaction like an impediment, – even if it´s hard – consider it your potential!

Understanding the real problem

He:

I am making the assumption that we’re here to help each other figure out how to discern what is wrong, discuss what we see, and somehow work together to correct what is wrong… whether in thinking, observation, or action.

Me:

If you feel the gravity and truth of my words, it means that you are a step nearer a clarifying viewpoint. The so-called solution comes as we speak. In my opinion, true and honest dialogue help each other drop the past. How can past knowledge understand something that has to be understood now…?

Verily, everything of importance happens now.

Whatever solution that comes through the filter of the past, is a mere continuation of our conditioning. Let´s leave the past to itself!

Consequently, to deal with a problem in its totality we have to let go of our inner patterns – we have to put aside expectation, even the very wish to know, and unreservedly and have a direct relation with what is going on NOW. Real action happens always in the now.

Staying with the problem requires the same vivid attention and immediacy as if it was a living entity.
Only in this direct vividness we can find a satisfactory solution. The so-called correction comes through understanding of the problem.

Change something through a new awareness

It is absolutely vital to understand that if we stay with our frustrations and fears of the past, the future will reiterate the same patterns,  and inevitably we will encounter the same traumas on and on in different disguises.

If we want to have a different future, IT IS IMPERATIVE TO CHANGE SOMETHING NOW, with other words, our tool is this very moment, to choose a new perspective now.

Obviously, the more you try to find a solution, all the more you reinforce and get stuck in the problem – certain things from the past cannot be “solved”. Mind has created this problems, and the mind cannot work upon itself.

Changes therefore, can only be done in a state of new awareness. Raising to a new level of perception, you will realize with amazement that there are no problems to solve anymore.

THE MIND IS THE PROBLEM MAKER. It exists and perpetuates itself in linearity, that is, in time.

On a  meta level, the only existing time is this Timeless Now.

Letting go of “time”, you let go of your mind, you let go of your problems. Being free, you will find the natural pulse of “here and now”. Only in this pulse you are real.

Gradually you realize that “future” can be just a happy sequence of “here and nows”.